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Author Archives: Cynthia Wang

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About Cynthia Wang

I'm a singer-songwriter - I write and perform your typical heartbroken singer-songwriter fare. Oh, I also teach at Cal State LA, but that's not going to be the focus of this blog.

High-altitude oxygen deprivation

Not something you experience every day unless you live in Boulder or Denver.

I’m in Boulder for a couple days, and if it weren’t for the fact that someone had mentioned the high altitude-ness of Boulder, I probably wouldn’t have noticed as much as I’m noticing now that
a) I am out of breath after walking a block
b) there is serious lactic acid build up in my muscles
c) my poor broken lung is protesting the low pressure
d) I’m getting lightheaded just sitting here
e) I feel cold – probably has something to do with O2 not getting anywhere, and
f) generally feels like I just ran a mile (when really, all I did was walk up a flight of stairs)

And I think the more I think about it, the worse it gets! Probably should just go to sleep and not think about it. Supposedly the O2 deprivation makes it harder to get up in the mornings too. Fantastic.

This, of course, is in no way impacted by the measly two hours of sleep I got last night, and a full day of activities here on campus, which included a discussion of political economy vs. cultural studies.

Otherwise, Boulder and CU and people are lovely. And the food is amazing too.

 
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Posted by on March 9, 2010 in Uncategorized

 

Hrm.

We have this problem in our HK home, where fishes that get put into the same tank as our turtle, Soupe, keep going MIA. My mom offers probably what is the best explanation of this situation in an email I got this morning…

>>>>>>>>>>>>

From: Jenny Wang
Subject: One more fish disappeared!!
Date: March 8, 2010 3:59:28 AM EST
To: Cynthia Wang

We suspected it may became the snack of Soupe.

Mama

 
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Posted by on March 8, 2010 in Uncategorized

 

Good ear?

So, I’m sure by this point, everyone’s heard of this ukulele kid (playing Jason Mraz’s “I’m Yours”). And I think a good number of people have probably seen his cover of Jake Shimabukuro’s cover of “While My Guitar Gently Weeps.”

Cute he absolutely is. Criticism aside, this kid either has a great teacher who’s teaching him all the tabs for these songs, or he simply has a great ear. I’m going for the latter, because it doesn’t look like he’s “learning tabs”. Really convinced he’s playing by ear. If that’s actually the case, that’s friggin’ amazing.
I didn’t really have a point with this post – well, I do, but to get to it would take several pages, and I must to bed. If I feel inspired to write later, perhaps I shall. All this should be read aloud with a British accent.
 
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Posted by on February 10, 2010 in Uncategorized

 

0 for 2 in the NYC music scene

Something about the New York indie music scene that intimidates me, I think. I can honestly say I played my worst set tonight at Five Points Variety Hour (in Chinatown), which I feel bad and sad about, because Five Points is made up of amazing people and has such a great vibe. It was a bit like a comedy of errors tonight.

So, I developed a bit of tendonitis a couple weeks ago, after I played at the MLK singalong thing, so I resolved to not bring my guitar to this gig (on one hand, playing guitar is what caused the pain in the first place, and second, carrying it around doesn’t help either), meaning I had less than a week to transpose two songs onto piano. Of course, between last week and this week, I got bronchitis too, and was in Phlegm-ville and Snotsville all week. I’m not sick anymore, there’s just residual stuff, but doesn’t do wonders for, you know, breathing. Yummy.

What really took the cake was frustrating at the time, but totally hilarious after the fact. Five Points has a house piano that I used. Except there was something wrong with the pedal. It sustained when you didn’t press it, and stopped sustaining as soon as you pressed it. Worked completely opposite of what it was supposed to do. I didn’t figure this out until my second piece, and in my attempt to try and have some sustain in the piano part, drove my mind to work overtime on a piece never before played on piano, and rarely performed in the first place. It was like that time in Australia, where I had to drive with the driver’s seat on the other side of the car, and on the opposite side of the road, sleep deprived, in the rain and in the dark.

The only other time I really had a “set” in NYC (the MLK Singalongs don’t count – the audience is much more forgiving – or maybe I just forgive myself more for mistakes and imperfections because of the informal venue) was a Vivaldi Caffe in the Village a year ago. Also a piano set, also not great. I think I have to resign myself to the fact that sticking to what works is good (playing songs written FOR guitar ON guitar that I can play in my sleep), at least for now, when I’m still trying to make friends in the NYC music scene. This whole trying to reinvent thing and playing unfamiliar stuff in a new city just isn’t working very well.

Five Points was really fun tonight though. I’ll hopefully be playing again in their new venue sometime this semester.

Ok. I’m done whining for the night and making excuses for myself. At this point, I think I’m on the verge of pulling an all-nighter. Oops.

 
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Posted by on February 6, 2010 in Uncategorized

 

Hacker/Scam alert

If you get this from a friend, it’s a scam:

“This had to come in a hurry and it has left me in a devastating state.We are in some terrible situation and I’m really going to need your urgent help.Some days ago,unannounced we came to visit resort center in Leicester Square.City London,but we got mugged by
some hoodlums and lost all my cash,credit cards,and cellphones,I was little injured but i thank god we are fine,we are financially stranded right now and our return flight leaves in few hours time but I need some money to clear some bills,So all I can do now is
pay cash and get out of here quickly.I do not want to make a scene of this why I did not call my house,this is embarrassing enough.I was wondering if you could loan me some cash,I promise I’ll refund it to you once we arrived home, hope to read from you as soon as possible.”

Makes me laugh a little, how transparent these things are now.

 
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Posted by on January 30, 2010 in Uncategorized

 

Avatar

Just saw Avatar. Quick thoughts. Execution, great. Technology and visuals, revolutionary. Story, tired. Cultural implications, huge. Lots of spoilers, though I feel like I’m one of the last folks on earth to see Avatar.

I’ll concentrate on the cultural implications of the movie. One can totally see what James Cameron is trying to do here – to show another culture in a protagonistic light, to welcome the audience into this “exotic” and different culture, to get us to relate to the characters, their plight, to make us feel their pain when their home is destroyed. He even goes as far as to make Jake Sully choose to abandon his (Western) culture to join the Navi (what I feel is simply a shortened version of “Native” or, in other words “primitive” – I know this point can be argued).

So there’s this clear dichotomy between Western culture and non-Western, primitive, “Indian”-like culture – cultures traditionally placed on a power scale in which Western culture is seen as superior. Avatar puts a lot of effort in stressing that the culture of guns and technological advancement is not necessarily superior – a point we are duly convinced of by the end of the film. By the end of the film, we, like Jake Sully, are drawn into this exotic culture, and we embrace it as a culture that, within this fictional world, is better than the gun-toting, tree-blasting military officials that represent the Western world. And then we go back to our own Western world, our consumerisms, our commodifications, our very Western-centric culture.

As a matter of fact, Avatar puts us, the audience, in a privileged position to embrace a “primitive”, “inferior” culture. By the end of the movie, we give ourselves pats on the back for being open-minded enough to see that a non-Western culture is superior to our own.

Here’s where things get problematic. The protagonists, the natives – they’re visually (and aurally at times) portrayed as aliens, different, foreign. Here’s that thing with system and culture again. System being what we’re told, culture being what we internalize and feel. Sure, at the end of the movie, in an almost tongue-in-cheek way, the humans are called “aliens”. But, dude. They LOOK like us. That we can’t deny. We’re just not blue, lanky creatures with pointy ears and flat noses.

Good for us for embracing a culture so very different from our own. Good for us for accepting the visually (and underlying tones of racially) and culturally different groups. But this film PUTS us in this position of privilege, PUTS us in this place where we can be entertained by the struggles of the Navi, and yes, even relate to them in some way. But the fact that we feel good about relating to a culturally different group (and then using that for commercial gain – James Cameron, once he breaks even, will be making bank) carry with it invisible, subconscious reinforcement of the pre-existing cultural power structures in place as it relates to the Western world and how the Western world perceives and relates to non-Western cultures. In the case of Avatar, these cultures become appropriated through the narrative, and appropriated by us, even being represented by Jake Sully taking on the form of a Navi by the end of the film. We each become a Jake Sully by the end of the film. But at the end of the day, only a Western protagonist can really save the day. Only a Western guy can change himself, and thereby change the world.

Furthermore on the two-dimensionality of the Navi, the film falls into that dangerous polarized categorization of good guys and bad guys. By making the “bad guys” (the humans) SO bad, while the Navi can do no wrong (there wasn’t even a bad Navi who went to the side of the humans – but of course, our human protagonists side with the Navi) – that’s a bit overcompensation, don’t you think? That, or all Navi are homogenously earth-loving and good-doing. Or victimized.

I’m not going to belabor the point more – I think I already have. I will say, though, it was a very enjoyable three hours, but the 3D aspect of it is completely unnecessary.

 
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Posted by on January 27, 2010 in Uncategorized

 

Systems and Cultures

I’ve always (ok, not always, but came up within the last year or so) had this theory. In any modern society (let’s not think too much about how we define society, or we’d get tangled in semantics all night – just what you’d normally think of as a society), there are two forces at play. One is culture, one is system. At least, those are the words I use. And they’re always at war – very rarely do they go hand in hand. For instance, we all know that racial equality is an ideology of America that we’re taught, and is reflected in our legislation. Hate crimes, employment discrimination, etc are against the law. However, I don’t believe anyone would argue with me that racism and racial discrimination still exists in society. That’s our culture, that’s what gets internalized through visual and educational representation, that’s what goes on beneath the surface of consciousness, and that’s how people live every day.

I bring this up because I’ve been getting into a lot of debates lately about China’s economic condition (ie: everyone seems to want to do business in China because the economy is booming), but I’ve been hesitant to believe that China’s economic boom is sustainable. This is, of course, based on almost no research on my part nor any in-depth knowledge about the global economic climate and all the messy dynamics of. However, I recently found this article about China’s economy (by Thomas Friedman), which seems to say a lot of what I feel. Not sure I agree with it completely, but it’s an interesting read.

This is a theme I’m probably going to try and expand upon more in later posts, but for now, I’m underslept and, hence, underthunk, so more later.

 
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Posted by on January 24, 2010 in Uncategorized

 

Losing a train of thought…

I found this in my “drafts” folder in Blogger today. It’s an incomplete blog from early November that I let sit until I forgot entirely what I was going to write about…

“I used to read so much news. I don’t anymore. It occurred to me just now as I read two articles – one about a missing baby found in a box and another about a teen who was set on fire. You know, the 2-minute news stories that are entertaining, but ultimately inconsequential. I used to snarf those up. What happened?

“Anyway. I had an epiphany today on the train. Not really an epiphany, but just a quiet thought, I guess.” …….?!

Ok, that is where I stopped. Reading that again, I want to take myself by the shoulders and shake me and yell, WHAT WAS YOUR EPIPHANY?! I even tried looking in my journal to see if I made some sort of reference to this epiphany about stupid news, and couldn’t find any. Maybe my quiet thought had to do with the fact that there’s so much consequential stuff out there I need to read that I can’t take the time to read stupid news like that. Or maybe it’s all this insignificant news that’s causing a culture of fear and paranoia in which our society seems to be entrenched. Or maybe it’s lamenting the fact that we’ve gotten so lost in the little details of culture and life that we lose sight of the really “important” stuff. I really don’t know.

Maybe this blog is more representative of why I shouldn’t be reading news. I simply don’t have time. I mean, I obviously don’t have time to finish a blog (until now). But I somehow magically find time to Facebook-stalk people for hours. My response to myself there is, hey, it’s for research.

 
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Posted by on January 11, 2010 in Uncategorized

 

Miscommunications: Avatar and Twilight

I didn’t realize until just now that the Avatar that’s out in theatres right now is different than the M Night Shyamalan’s adaptation of Avatar, The Last Airbender, where there was some uproar from the Asian American community about it (that I heard about from Emily in the first place) and was about to boycott it on principle, no matter how many people said it was good. Thankfully, I can go enjoy Avatar now, guilt-free. Sarah and I had a 5 minute conversation about this before we realized we were talking about different movies.

And this isn’t the first time something like this has happened. Last semester, I was on the phone with Dawen, and we were talking about “Twilight.” I must have been going on and on about how how it reinforces the dominant hegemonic framework or something, and he responded with something else, and off we went merrily on our conversation, until I mentioned something about “vampires”. I then hear a pause on the line, and Dawen goes, “…Vampires…?!” It turns out that he was talking about Twilight: Los Angeles, 1992 by Anna Deavere Smith, a book about the LA Riots after the Rodney King incident. Because of this incident, though, we both ended up reading the Stephanie Meyers Twilight as a dare/bet.

This is good though – a little part of me used to die a little every time another person said how amazingly incredible “Avatar” is. I think the new one is being called “Airbender.” As for Airbender, Emily gives four points on why she was so angered at the casting decisions:

1) i love the show 2) very rarely does a show portray asian culture in a beautiful and nonstereotypical light 3) very rarely do you see a show about asian ppl at all 4) and now all of what makes avatar special is taken away — might as well just be like any other action movie

I feel kinda stupid. And really uninformed right now. What happens when one gets so bogged down in everything else in life.

Why is my font weird in this post?!

 
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Posted by on December 28, 2009 in Uncategorized

 

Lost friend found

Remember over the summer I wanted to start a digital/Internet experiment to find my friend Wesley? The project got quickly dropped as life and grad school and other work got in the way. But it was always in the back of my mind. I never did end up emailing Wesley’s old piano teacher, nor did I follow up any of the other avenues of contact I came into of late. I mentioned this “project” to my interpersonal communication professor, Dr. Susan Fox, who is somewhat of an expert in finding people online. A few weeks ago, before I guest lectured in her class, we looked up “Wesley Bender” in a few people-search-engines she frequents, and got some hits. Unfortunately, to pursue those leads would take money and more time than we had just at that moment. But that boosted my confidence that I would eventually succeed.

I just got back to LA, and naturally, being home (with a neurotic puppy no less) creates a relaxing environment to splooch (completely made-up word that I’ve never used before, but what I do often feels like splooching) online while I research my final paper for my paper class. Social LIFE of paper. Since Facebook changed its privacy policies, I realize that the default setting for the new privacy stuff was more open. I hide my searches from people who aren’t my friends, and because I’m a privacy nut (at least on Facebook), I made sure I combed through my privacy settings as soon as the new one came. But not all people are like that. So, on a whim, I searched for Wesley again. And found someone who might be her.

Last night, I messaged this person, and lo and behold, it was Wesley. So, long story short, it really didn’t take me that much effort to find my friend, but, it did take a long time.

Best Christmas gift ever. We have a lot of catching up to do.

 
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Posted by on December 19, 2009 in Uncategorized